Landing hard tonight. And notice that I am emotionally isolated from the people in my world again. I don’t know what is worse – feeling distant from people and the world, or the chaos, the excessive, colourful expression and my ‘otherworldly’ reality.

In this moment, I just want to be close to the people I love, and I want to connect with them. Maybe it doesn’t matter if I am part of some kind of alternate reality to do so. Although I am sure any sensible, or rational person would say that it isn’t worth it. That living in that alternate reality is not okay. I just feel so alone in this ‘real world’.

What do they say? ‘Choose your hard?’