a simulacrum of attachment
A bit scary, though!!
31
10, 2026
31
10, 2026
the morning after
Trying to lift my mood this morning! If I had two molecules of dopamine to rub together it would be a miracle! After the highs of yesterday, I hit my morning with a bit of [...]
30
10, 2026
drats! Not again :-(
I feel like a sad dog. When am I going to start SHOWING UP!?! It has gone beyond a joke. I need to show up, no matter what. 'No ifs, no buts, no maybes', as [...]
30
10, 2026
but maybe i could do it anyway!!
I am weary though. It is amazing how much a couple of belly laughs and a 1.5 hour conversation could take it out of me. Again. . . I am not sure that I should [...]
30
10, 2026
anxiety that has barely even begun!!
The good thing about anxiety is that it teaches me to feel like crap and 'do it anyway'. That may be the lesson that this little misadventure teaches me. *fingers crossed.
30
10, 2026
in a more positive light
I should wash my mouth out, hehe. All those things that are on my page that (many of you) can't see. . . . (lololol) I am enjoying the last hurrah of this little pharmacological [...]
29
10, 2026
the work of the poorly
It would be so nice if all I had to do was lick my wounds today. Is that the tiniest burst of dopamine pushing through?
29
10, 2026
FOMO – – – through
So poorly. And I don't think I can go home like this. Half an hour of conversation feels like a gigantic effort. I am patiently waiting for the storm to pass. Looking back makes me [...]
22
10, 2026
whiplash
It feels so wrong. I know that doesn't mean it IS wrong. But it still feels wrong.
22
10, 2026
some kind of dream
If the depth of the tears is an indication of the depth of feelings, then it clearly sucks. For some reason the person that stands out from the chaos of this mess is my brother. [...]