stomach knots for a different reason now
It is hard to write. I am so stressed out. The pressure is on.
15
01, 2026
15
01, 2026
a storm in the pit of my stomach
And I let the mood slide down, when it could have gone up? I have had enough pain for a year of Sundays. Still, it doesn't feel GOOD, I suppose. . . maybe that is [...]
15
01, 2026
tomorrow is a new day
I feel very, very sad. . . And text is not it, , , but it is not the time and place for anything else. . . a phone call :-/ I don't want to [...]
14
01, 2026
((music is the light))
Sorry. I shouldn't have opened up an email chat. I read the markers all wrong. In any case, I can write to you here, perhaps. (Now I don't know what to say), , , except [...]
12
01, 2026
the fault line
Feeling like the only hope is to be a little playful. I am not sure that disappearing from the internet is the answer. And I am so embarrassed. I am burning up inside. Is it [...]
12
01, 2026
when the energy is poorly
My soul has never felt this sick inside. And words on the internet are merely trite. I need to get up, and vomit all over my feet. I don't know what else to do. Is [...]
11
01, 2026
drastic change or play safe
AI has me playing safe. Holding on to the vestiges of my support work roles - for money. Maybe I didn't mention that I still have one job that still keeps me nearly above water. [...]
11
01, 2026
house is not a home
I feel so confused. I get the sense that I am not supposed to 'be here', and yet, I am wondering for 'how long' do I need to be away? Because I can't imagine that [...]
9
01, 2026
so much for a new world
So much for reducing screen time. I have been glued to my screen all day. In some kind of desperate attempt to recover the financial ground that I have lost, this psychosis. It seems like [...]
7
01, 2026
when trying gets stale
Help!! I have no idea what I am doing now. I have tried so many times to get on that train to my home. And I am not even sure why it feels so important [...]